Tuesday, 27 of June of 2017

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The Dark Lebowski

What if Donny Kerabatsos and Donnie Darko showed up to the wrong set?

What if Frank the rabbit had a cleft asshole?

What if it Walter was a high school teacher?

What if the Germans were smurfs?

Writers Laura Braun and Eric Tolles answer all those questions, and more!

Your mailbox is calling, dude. -Laura

‎I`m throwing Charmin tonight! Meet at 8 dude. -Eric

Do you see what happens Donnie? Do you see what happens Donnie? DO YOU SEE WHAT HAPPENS DONNIE, WHEN YOU INSERT THE LIFELINE EXERCISE CARD INTO A TEACHER’S ANUS? -Eric

Son, you are entering a wormhole of pain. -Laura

It really tied the kiddie porn dungeon together, did it not?
And this kid started a fire in it. -Eric

‎So you have no frame of reference here, Donny. you’re like a child that wanders into the middle of a double homicide… -Laura

You want a sparrow, I can get you a sparrow. I can get you a sparrow by 3 o’clock, with gray hair. -Eric

You’re killing your rabbit Donnie. -Laura

Obviously, you’re not a sleep-golfer. -Eric

Also, Dude, ‘Fuckass’ is not the preferred nomenclature. -Laura

Do you still think about girls a lot?
You mean ‘coitus?’ -Laura

I’ll suck a fuck for a thousand dollars. -Eric

She’s a therapist?
She was threatening medication. Are we gonna split hares here? -Eric

They’re called ‘Sparkle Motion,’ they’re some kind of, ugh, Pedo-Pop. -Eric

Say what you want about the tenets of National Smurfism; at least it’s asexual -Eric

Nobody fucks with the Cunningham. -Eric

Chut the fuck up Donnie. -Laura

I am really starting to doubt your commitment to the next round robin. -Laura

Life does not start and stop at your convenience, you mysterious rabbit costume. -Eric

I could just be sitting here with a jet engine in my room. -Eric

And you know, he’s got emotional problems man.
You mean…beyond parodoxism? -Eric

I’m just going to go find a time machine. -Eric

Do you see the fear people? Do you see the fear people? DO YOU SEE THE FEAR PEOPLE, WHEN YOU SEARCH FOR AN ANSWER IN THE WRONG PLACE? -Eric

Hey, careful man, there’s a portal here! -Laura

You must be here to fix the cellar door. -Eric

Lord. You can imagine where it goes from here.
He collapses the tangent universe? -Laura

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